Euro-wtf-vision vs. American Idol

Okay,
So as the voting goes on in the other room, and before I will throw up all over my flat... I want to take this opportunity to share some of my impressions from this years Eurovision song contest... First and foremost, I'd like to thank the lords above that this eve, I was alone at home, and did not partake in any social viewing of the event... was not forced to share in the shame and agony of this decadent and rotten song contest evening...
Seriously, when did Europe become such a pathetic Continent...? A lot of things have been said about Europe... but really, the Continent of Leonardo and Cervantes, and Maria Callas, and Mozart... pathetic? Really? Is Europe going back into the dark ages?
What the hell is wrong with people? Since when did the "prestigious competition" or at least the eve of wholesome yelling at the TV laughing and occasional singing (more of less...) The competition that brought us ABBA and Jhonny Logan, and that song about Ginges Khan... Since when did it become the sole platform for transsexual cross dressing foreign workers and honestly the combination of the most unattractive people that have been put together in one place in a long time. Okay maybe the show has always been a bit strange... but never like the nature of the horror of last night...
It is like the Balkans and Eastern Block took over Europe for the evening, and as feared they were too immature to deal with the responsibility... Like the songs were horrific! Just Awful...! It is like a drunken frat house were running the show... Last years' Klingon's were more respectable than what was going on this year...
I am just really sad that the dude from "Fear and Loathing" is dead and so he can't write a column about it, because you really need a professional to fully describe the terror of last eve's "entertainment"...
Let's say it was just boring... that would be okay... but why must it be unbearably embarrassing in addiiton to the boringness...? By the way, the fact that they shortened the voting process makes matters even worse as it emphasizes the nature of the songs even more as not enough time goes by from when the songs are sung to the end of the event... plus really, the voting in the best part... all kids in Israel can count from 1-8, 10 and 12, in English, French and Flemish... They know the Capitals of all Eurpoean countires... it is cool! But not anymore...

I don't know what was worse, the song that won, the alien song, or the fact that the Von Trap family singers had more to offer dead than the bunch of corpses on the stage... There was real chaos, I think, everybody was singing in English? English? Really? You see, Europe is such an eclectic place, each newly invented country sings laod and proud in the language of Shakespeare... not that there is anything wrong with it, really, but if you went to all that effort to break up the former Yugoslavian republic... Don't you think, in Alexanders honor, you shoud at least sing in Macadonian?

The only song worth mentioning really was actually the Finish song, they brung a pseudo Evanescence song this year... but you see, it is not about the music, the lyrics or even national pride, it is about who can send more text messages, who has more foreign laborers spread around to vote, so actually which European country has the poorest and most crapiest economy... and those are the countries that got the highest points...

It's not that I care so much, really and if there were no more Eurovision, I doubt I would shed a tear... it has just always been a nice eve where one can officially express ones dismay at the Holocaust and Europe's attitude toward the Jews through out the generations...

All the while, "American Idol" were doing their Barry Gibb evening... not without it's problem, but at least not a freak show or weirdo zombies from outer space... (look at the pic again)